The Curse of Twinkie Man
by Troo
Summary: The 'Poltergeist: the Legacy' crew runs into the 'Power Rangers' posse. A Twinkie turns bad. Rating this T. I seem to remember some slight language and people in spandex. T'was written many years back, but I've just gathered up the courage to post it.


**A/N**: You will probably find this to be very, very silly. And stupid. But that's okay. We enjoyed writing it. Please review if you feel like it. :)

**The Curse of Twinkie Man**

_A Strangely Intriguing Poltergeist: the Legacy/Power Ranger Crossover!_

**By the Ambiguously Strange Duo**

_We're ambiguous. We're strange. And we're in your head...

* * *

_

_Somewhere in the realms of fantasy (at least we hope it's fantasy...) there is a place called Angel Grove. It has a little problem. Well, a rather big problem, really. Once a week, it gets trashed by big Styrofoam monsters, and then the city gets saved by some decidedly dodgy-looking teenagers in spandex. Now, in another fantasy, there's an organization called the Legacy, which runs round kicking the computer-generated asses of assorted demons, and the occasional evil-minded human. Now imagine the chaos that would happen if those two fantasies joined. Welcome to that chaos...

* * *

_

Somewhere in Angel Grove pond (okay, it's a mighty deep pond) there's an alien submarine. No one over the age of nine knows how it got there, and no one over the age of nine really cares anyway, but it's there. If you listen closely, you can hear the rantings and ravings of a skimpily-dressed woman with a gold mask; and she ain't happy.

* * *

"Elgar!" Divatox screams out to one of her assorted minions. "Elgar, where's that intergalactic phone book!"

Elgar looks up from where he is pulling the legs off a water-spider that has unfortunately crawled aboard the submarine. "Didn't we use it in making our last monster, Phone-O?"

Divatox sighs as Elgar goes back to the little spider. You really couldn't get the staff these days. "So, not only have we lost our only copy of the intergalactic phone book, but once again, we've lost the battle against spandex-clothed teenagers in over-sized jeeps." She throws herself down onto her comfy chair, and sticks her thumb in her mouth. Elgar wanders over.

"Are you okay?"

"No!" Divatox mumbles around her thumb. "I'm having a bad day."

Elgar puts his arm around her shoulders, giving her a hug. "Cheer up, Diva! Tell you what, we'll do whatever you want today, how's that?"

"Anything I want?" Divatox says in a small voice, wallowing in the most disgusting self-pity. She stands up suddenly, accidentally knocking her over-sized companion to the floor. "You know what I want to do today? I want to be rid of those pesky Rangers once and for all!" She starts to laugh evilly, but her cackles die into coughs. Stumbling to the phone, she roots out her little black book from the side cabinet, and dials the quickest number in there - 666.

"Hey there, hot-stuff." Divatox says in her most sultry voice, which unfortunately sounds like a cat being scalped by sand-paper. "Fancy helping me out and destroying the world in the bargain? Yeah, today would be fine with me... San Francisco Bay? Yeah, we'll be there in an hour. Look out for a submarine that looks for a fish, okay?" Hanging up the phone, Divatox grins triumphantly at Elgar.

"Today... is going to be a beautiful day."

Derek looks around the library at his companions, and sighs hopelessly. They are meant to be working on their latest case, helping out a family being terrorized by a demon, but none of his team seems to be taking an interest in the investigation. Alex is sitting at the big table with her feet up, painting her toe-nails a lurid colour of yellow. Rachel is yapping on the phone to one of her friends, twirling a strand of her hair around her finger as she talks. Derek listens in, trying to understand the conversation.

"So I said to her, well, if that's what he said to you that's fine with me, but that wasn't what he said to her, and she says, well, what did he say to you, and I said to her, well, if he said something different to me, then I really shouldn't tell you what he told me, but seeing as you told me about what he said to you, I'll tell you what he said to me, but you have to tell me what he said he said to me..."

At that point, Derek gives up, and turns his attention to the youngest member of the team. Nick is sitting on the table, combat boots trailing mud all over the rugs that had only been cleaned that morning. The young man has his head stuck in an Archie comic, and several empty packets of Twinkies lay scattered around him. Nick is munching on yet another one of the sticky snacks, and Derek shakes his head, amazed. The kid is a walking toxic waste dump.

The second phone line rings, and Derek is suddenly glad he got it installed, even though it was only so Nick didn't hog the line all the time on the Internet.

"Derek Rayne." Derek says in his best business voice.

"Rayne, get your butt over here now!" The precept winces as he recognizes the voice of Charley Mainsone, the father of the family they were meant to be helping. "That little sucker's back, and I want him gone! You got ten minutes, or you don't get paid!"

Derek gulps, knowing that if he doesn't get paid this time, he won't be able to afford getting the carpets cleaned again. "I'll be right dere." He says, his accent becoming thicker with panic.

Derek hangs up the phone, grabs the other phone from Rachel, disconnecting it, and grabs her by the wrist, propelling her to the door.

"Hey, wait a minute...!" she protests.

Derek ignores her, grabs Alex around the waist, and drags the two women towards the door. He puts them in the car and is halfway down the drive, when he realizes he has forgotten something major... Derek slams on the brakes.

"Damn, forgot my wallet!" he says, jumping out the car. "Be right back!"

Up in the library, Derek grabs his wallet, before noticing that Nick is still sitting on the table, engrossed in his comic. Derek debates leaving him there, but realizing his chances of getting beaten up if Nick isn't around shoot up to a 100 probability, he grabs the Twinkie out of Nick's hand, and throws the comic onto the table. Nick immediately grabs his gun out of the back of his jeans waistband, and Derek grabs it crossly when he sees it is only a water-pistol.

"Oh, for gootness sakes, grow up!" Derek thunders. Nick meekly follows his friend out of the room and out to the car, looking longingly back at the half-eaten Twinkie on the table.

* * *

At the bottom of San Francisco Bay, Divatox is chatting with her old friend, the Devil. He is a little chap, dressed in a red cat-suit, sporting a pair of little horns and a forked tail, and he carries a pitchfork around with him. The two are plotting their dastardly plan to bump off the Rangers, but can't decide whether to destroy the world, or just to rule it. Presently, Elgar and the little inventor-creature whose name no one can remember, enter the room, with the blueprints for the monster to end all monsters.

"We found all the ingredients." Elgar informs Divatox. "Thing is, now all we need is a Twinkie."

* * *

At the house, it had been surprisingly easy to dispel the annoying demon. Rachel had been wearing her Day-Glo orange micro-mini skirt that day, and one look at the doctor had been enough to send the demon screaming back to Hell. Derek collects his pay - cash, not a check - and they head out of the house.

"Man, am I hungry." Nick grumbles, rubbing his ever-hungry stomach. "I didn't even get to finish my Twinkie."

"You can have all the Twinkies you want when we get back to the island." Derek bribes, shoving Nick towards the car.

Nick hold out his hand. "Can I drive?"

"Not a chance." Derek snorts.

His three companions all look at one another for a moment, then scream out "Shotgun!" and dash for the car. Derek closes his eyes, wondering what he could have possibly done in a former life to piss off his Maker this much. He arrives at the car in time to separate Rachel and Alex, who are pulling each other's hair in an effort to keep their opponent away from the car. Nick is lying curled on the ground, after receiving a hefty kick in the nether regions from a heeled boot. Derek winces in sympathy.

"Nick, are you okay?" he asks. Nick nods and gives a little gasp in the affirmative, his voice several octaves higher than normal. Derek grabs Alex and Rachel, and drags them apart.

"Who kicked Nick?" Derek demands.

"She did!" Both the girls say at once.

"Did not!"

"Did too!"

"Did not!"

"Did too!"

"Shut up!" Derek roars. "In the back, both of you! Nick, in the front!"

Nick manages to crawl into the passenger seat, and Derek starts the car, driving faster than necessary, and begins thinking of a hundred ways to kill his companions.

* * *

Meanwhile, down in the submarine, the Devil is trying to console a traumatized little demon.

"It was horrible!" sobs the demon. "It was all Day-Glo orange, and made of lycra! I just couldn't handle it! I failed! Master, forgive me!"

"Never." The Devil smiles sweetly. In all truth, he'd kinda gotten used to losing to the Legacy, and he was thinking of giving up and retiring. Maybe he could make a career as an attorney... "But I do have a job for you." the Devil continues. "Go to Angel Island and get us that Twinkie. Bring it back to us."

* * *

The demon flies as quickly as he can to the island. On the way, he dons his sunglasses, in the vain hope they can protect him from the Legacy's terrible secret-weapon - those micro-mini skirts. The demon flies in through an open window, landing in a heap on the library floor. He brushes himself off, and makes a face at the mess in the room. It is even worse than the locker rooms after the annual Demons-Angels basketball game. Looking around, the demon spies a half-eaten Twinkie sitting innocently on the table. He heads for it, gingerly picking up the soggy snack between two claws, and prepares to fly back out the window, when he hears the front door open, and the sound of bickering flooding up the stairs.

"Derek, she broke my nail!"

"Well, she ruined my manicure!"

"Let's face it, sister, you need all the manicuring you can get!"

"Derek, did you hear what she said? Derek? Derek, don't ignore me!"

The demon groans, wondering what he is going to do now. He can hear the Legacy members coming up the stairs, and he doesn't fancy meeting the same fate twice within one hour.

* * *

On the submarine, Divatox and the Devil are watching the scene through a periscope. Somehow, Divatox's periscope can see into any place she desires, which comes in handy because of that darn court order against her, telling her not to come within twenty miles of Tom Cruise.

"We're going to have to do this now." Divatox sighs. "I hope this works."

They hold hands, pick their noses, and fling the boogies high into the air. The slimy green globs disappear in a little puff of aqua-marine smoke, and on Angel Island, the demon and the Twinkie began to merge...

* * *

Far away, in Angel Grove, the Power Rangers, in their daily guise of slightly-abnormal teenagers, are sitting in Ernie's Juice Bar. Tanya and Kat are discussing the cutest guys in the high school, and Tommy and Adam are pretending not to listen. Justin looks suspiciously at Tommy.

"Why are you still in high school?" he asks. "You've been in tenth grade for, what? Five years?"

Tommy shrugs. "I don't know. Somehow, I never seem to graduate."

"I better not be in sixth grade for the rest of my life!" Justin looks worried.

"At least you look like a teenager." Adam says, shaving his stubble with an electric razor for the third time that day. He squints at Justin. "Okay, almost a teenager."

Justin is about to make a rude comment back, something about Adam's questionable parentage, when Tommy's wristwatch bleeps. "Tommy here." the long-haired one says.

On the other end, Alpha sounds slightly annoyed. "I know it's you, Tommy. I contacted you, remember?"

"What's the problem?" Tommy asks, ignoring the tetchy little robot's comment.

"Zordon and I picked up abnormal Twinkie activity in San Francisco." Alpha replies, as coldly as a robot can. "Time for you to take a field trip."

"Do we got to?" Tanya whines. "Beverly Hills is on tonight!"

"Oh, God, Luke Perry is so cute!" Kat simpers. Tanya sighs, and the two look off into the distance, happy smiles on their faces.

The guys just give them odd looks. "Uh, Alpha?" Adam says. "Could you transport us now? Please?"

* * *

Alex and Rachel each head for their respective rooms to repair the damage they have done to each other on the ride home. Nick climbs the stairs very slowly, attempting to head for the kitchen to get an ice pack. "Are you going to be able to make it to the kitchen by yourself?" Derek asks Nick before heading for the opposite end of the house to escape the bickering females. Nick just nods and turns back to finish the grueling climb.

Derek gets to his private office and sits down at his desk. _Why me?_ he wonders to himself as he starts banging his head on the desk. _Bang! Bang! Bang!_

"Help meeeee...!"

He jerks his head up from the last _Bang!_ when he hears the yell coming from upstairs. _Nick! Dear Gott, I must have forgotten to refill the ice maker!_ With that, Derek dashes out of the room and up to the kitchen.

He reaches the doorway just as Alex and Rachel do. The three all try to squish through the doorway at the same time and get stuck, Derek in the middle.

"Get that frizzy hair out of my face or I'm gonna rip it out!" Rachel yells angrily at Alex.

"You'd better get that hand off my butt first, or else!" Alex yells back.

"That's not _my_ hand!" Rachel says.

"Well then, who's is it!" The two turn to look at Derek who raises both hands as high as he can and gives them a 'don't-look-at-me' look.

"If it's not Derek, it's got to be you!"

Again, the arguing gets to him and he manages to push the two out into the hallway where they continue fighting. Derek moves along into the kitchen to figure out what Nick is in need of.

Once inside, he quickly figures out what the problem is. Nick appears to be stuck to the wall, to Derek's left, by a strange, sticky, dessert-cake-filling type of substance. Derek immediately rushes to his side and manages to scrape some of the stuff away from Nick's head.

With the white stuff removed and his oxygen supply at least partially restored, Nick looks over Derek's shoulder and his eyes open wide in terror. "Wmmmph Oooooomph!"

"What?" Derek questions as he scrapes the last bit away from Nick's mouth.

"Watch Ou...mph!" Nick yells as another glob of the substance hurtles by Derek's head and undoes all the work he has just done.

Derek whirls around and comes face to... um... well... face with a human sized Twinkie that is wearing cheap, black sunglasses. It is just standing across the room from the two, smirking. In all of his years with the Legacy, Derek has never encountered anything quite as strange, and is staring in shock at the monstrosity in front of him when the two ragged females enter the room.

"Derek, look at what Alex did to my new shirt!"

"New? That looks like it was designed ten years ago!" Alex notices that Derek is staring at something in the corner of the room behind her and turns to find something tall, yellow, and spongy staring back at her through dark sunglasses. Rachel is still scrutinizing the damage to her shirt and doesn't notice the danger.

The Twinkie fires. Alex ducks and Rachel takes the full glob in the side of the head, knocking her down to the ground. Alex squats down to help Rachel up but is seized by a fit of laughter when she sees how ridiculous Rachel looks. Her laughter is interrupted when a second blob hits her in the head and shoves her face-first onto Rachel.

Seeing his team-mates in trouble, Derek snaps out of the trance and runs to the Twinkie. An action, that if he had been thinking, he wouldn't have bothered with. Days later Derek will sit down to write his report on this case and will realize that someone upstairs had answered his prayers for peace and quite. If he had only known at the time and had left Nick, Alex and Rachel at the Twinkie's disposal and made a dash for it.

He starts pummeling the smooshy aberration with his fists, accomplishing nothing. Nothing, that is, until he accidentally knocks the sunglasses off of the Twinkie. The second the glasses are off, Rachel's Day-Glo skirt takes effect.

"I'm melting!" the Twinkie screeches in pain, covering it's eyes. Derek backs away. As it sinks to it's knees in an attempt for sympathy, it realizes that Derek, Rachel, Alex, and the white glob that is Nick are staring at him in wonder. "Oops, wrong show!" he says with a prankish glint in his eyes.

Twinkie-Man hops to his feet and dashes around the counter to the nearest window. Grabbing a near-by frying pan, he knocks out the window. Derek advances, trying to stop the Twinkie from escaping. In an attempt to keep Derek away, the Twinkie throws his only weapon, the frying pan, at Derek. He misses miserably. "Why does everyone always do that?" Derek questions in confusion.

"Do what?" the Twinkie ponders back.

"Throw their only weapon away when it would be soooo much smarter to hang onto the damn thing!"

"I have _no_ idea. It just seemed like a good thing to do at the time," Twinkie-Man answers. "If we're done chatting, I really must be going. You know, places to go, people to cream." With that he turns, leaps through the window, and attempts to fly away as usual. Unfortunately for him, the power of flight was lost in the demon-Twinkie merge.

Derek gets to the smashed window in time to see the Twinkie push himself up from the white puddle on the ground and hobble away. Seeing that there is no hope of pursuit, he turns to his creamy companions. "Alex, would you please pull Nick off of the wall and help him get cleaned up?"

"I don't have to give him a bath do I?"

"Of course not! Just don't let him trail that stuff all over the carpet. It'll never come out."

While Alex attempts to pull Nick away from the wall, Derek helps Rachel to her feet. "I never thought I would say this, but, I'm glad you bought that skirt."

"You like it, really?" she asks as she pushes her body enticingly closer to his.

"No, I think it's horrid, but it has scared away trouble two times today. I bet we could mass produce this stuff and fight off all sorts of bad guys."

Rachel looks at him indignantly and stalks out of the room to get cleaned up, again.

"Ummphh! Nick! Get off'a me!"

Derek turns to find that Alex has successfully detached Nick from the wall only to have him land on her and stick the both of them to the floor. "Derek! Help me!"

He starts towards the pair but has a quick little 'vision' of the three of them stuck to the floor together. He immediately changes course and walks out of the kitchen and towards his bedroom, leaving them to their own destruction.

* * *

After much showering and scrubbing, the team reunites in the control room. They contact the Ruling House and inform the rest of the Legacy of their strange visitor. As Derek is breaking the connection to the Ruling House, a police scanner squawks to life.

_"This is Officer Timmons, requesting back-up to San Fransisco City Park. There's a giant Twinkie terrorizing citizens in the park."_

A second voice comes on, _"Could you repeat that please? It sounded like you said there is a giant Twinkie in the park."_

_"That's what I said! A giant Twinkie!"_

_"Timmons! You expect me to believe that after the 'giant Oreo in the YMCA swimming pool' prank you pulled last week?"_

_"This time it's real! You gotta believe... Ahhhhhhh!"_

Alex turns the scanner down as Timmons' screams fill the airwaves.

"We've got to get to the park, now!" Derek commands. "Nick, you go warm up the helicopter. Alex, go search for anything you can quickly find on this type of occurrence. Rachel... what should I have you do?"

"I'll go make a picnic lunch for us. We are going to the park after all." With that she skips off towards the kitchen and the others head off to complete their duties.

_Why is there never a herd of elephants to trample me to death when I need one?_ Derek questions as he attempts to pull out some of his wavy dark-grayish hair in frustration.

Alex walks back into the Control Room a couple of minutes later and announces, "I can't find anything like this in any of the databases. No one has ever seen a walking Twinkie before."

"Well, we're not going anywhere soon." Nick interrupts as he returns to the Control Room far too quickly.

"What's the matter?" Derek inquires.

"There's Twinkie filling in the chopper's engine. He sabotaged us."

"It could be a she." Alex says matter-of-factly.

"What?" Nick responds.

"The Twinkie. It could be a she."

"I can't believe you two are arguing over the gender of a Twinkie."

* * *

The five Rangers are given the information they need for this situation when they arrive at the Command Center. Alpha then transports them to the Legacy House on Angel Island.

* * *

As their eyes adjust to the darkness around them, they realize everything is not how it should be. "Where are we?" Kat whines.

"I think Alpha messed up a little. It appears we have transported into the basement." Adam promptly informs the group.

"Well, we've got to get out of here and find these 'Legacy' people Alpha told us about." Tommy instructs his group.

"And we need to do it _fast_! I have to go to the bathroom!" This time it's Tanya who is sounding rather whiny.

"You were supposed to go _before_ we left, _before_ you put your suit on! You do this to us every time." Adam scolds.

"I did!"

In an attempt to diffuse a potentially threatening situation, Tommy interrupts, "Let's find out where these stairs go."

* * *

Rachel walks into the Control Room with her picnic basket just as the security alarm goes off. Nick rushes to the computer console to find out what is happening. "We've got five people wearing spandex suits and silly looking helmets in our basement. Can this day get any stranger? On second thought, don't answer that."

"How did they get there?" Rachel inquires.

"How the heck am I supposed to know! Derek's the psychic one around here. Ask him." Nick responds.

As she turns to Derek, he puts up his hand, palm towards her, in order to cut off the question before it escapes from her lips. "I've had just about enough of this nonsense. Rachel, put down that basket and start acting your age! Let's go find out who these people are."

* * *

The four get to the basement door just as it falls out of the door frame. The Rangers emerge from the basement, Adam still carrying his laser-cutter. "Freeze!" Nick yells as he points his gun at them. "Put down the... the... what is that anyway!"

"It's a solar-powered-high-intensity-red-colored-slightly-rough-to-the-touch cutting laser. I'm sorry I had to use it on your door. It was locked." Adam informs the Legacy members.

"Derek, you gotta get us some of those." Nick says as he totally forgets about the strangers in skin-tight outfits in front of him.

"You must be Derek," Tommy says to the slightly frazzled looking man standing next to the shorter, younger man with the gun.

"Yes I am. Who the heck are you, what were you doing in our basement, and for gootness sake, why are you wearing spandex!"

Before anyone can answer, Rachel throws in, "Aren't you five a little young to be running around California by yourselves?"

"Do you have someplace that we can talk?" Tommy asks.

* * *

The nine people enter the Legacy House living room and Rachel offers their best couches and recliners to the Rangers. "Give us a second and we'll change out of our uniforms." Adam states.

"There's a bathroom down the hallway." Alex offers. "Second door on the right."

"Oh goody!" Tanya squeals as she takes off running. In her excitement she knocks Justin down.

Regaining his senses, Justin complains from the floor, "Yeah, just knock the short guy down. He doesn't care. No one ever knocks Tommy down. Why doesn't anyone ever knock Tommy down..."

Ignoring Justin's complaints from the behind the couch, Tommy pushes a button on his wrist-watch controller pad. In a flash, the spandex is gone. Almost normal looking teenagers fill the spots where shiny super-people had been only seconds before. Justin hops up from behind the couch.

"Hey, wait a minute. You're like 10 years old, aren't you?" Nick asks.

Justin turns dark red and is just about to do something to Nick that he would regret later when Adam interrupts, "He's old enough. Besides, the suit makes him look bigger. Tommy, it's your turn to explain everything."

"I thought it was your turn."

"Nope. I explained this stuff to the guy in the red cape that we helped last week."

"You're right. Sorry dude. Okay, it's like this." Tommy turns to the Legacy four, "We are the Power Rangers. We live in Angel Grove. We work for Zordon. He's from the planet Eltar. We fight against Divatox, this really _strange_ looking lady, who is always trying to destroy us and rule the world. We get to drive these really cool cars around and shoot really cool guns. And you guys are members of The Legacy. A stuffy group of old people that pretty much do the same thing, but without the cool guns."

Derek asks, "How did you know that?"

"Zordon told us. Anyway, Divatox has teamed up with someone that you guys fight all the time. The Devil. Zordon figured it would be good for us to team up with someone who has experience fighting him, so here we are." As he finishes, he finally remembers to breathe.

"So, you guys fight living Twinkies often?" Rachel questions.

Adam takes over for the oxygen-deprived Tommy, "Divatox is always sending some sort of monster for us to fight. She tends to use whatever is lying around. One day a trumpet, the next a stink-bug. You never know what she'll use next."

* * *

The two groups spend the next thirty or so minutes discussing Divatox, the devil, Twinkies run amok, and how to stop said evil from covering the world in creamy filling. About ten minutes into the exchange Alex stops staring at Tommy long enough to ask, "How do you keep your hair so shiny and healthy looking?"

* * *

Just as everyone is ready to go out and save the world, the little problem of transportation rears it's ugly little head.

"The Twinkie dude creamed our copter." Nick tells the Rangers. "If we're gonna work together on this, we're gonna need some sort of transportation."

"We can transport you there." Adam pipes up helpfully, getting an annoyed look from Justin who really wants to just leave the Legacy people here on their island to clean up the Twinkie filling that still covers the kitchen. "Just give me a minute and we'll have Alpha lock onto all of us and we'll be there in no time."

Adam begins to talk to the green watch on his wrist, receiving worried looks from the Legacy people.

"Does he talk to inanimate objects often?" Rachel whispers to Tanya. The teenager is too busy staring longingly at Nick to answer, so Rachel crosses hers arms and begins to sulk. Nick gives the others a 'What kind of drugs are they on?' look as the Rangers all stand up and began to stare at their wristbands as if they will suddenly sprout wings and fly away.

Suddenly, the world disappears in a flash of white light and a curious smell that is almost like mouldy socks in the bottom of a gym locker. Then the city of San Francisco materializes in front of them, and they see they are in San Fransisco City Park. A chaotic sight greets the group, but they have to concentrate hard not to laugh. People are stuck to trees, to poles, to the ground, all with white Twinkie filling. The look of horror on the innocent people's faces is almost comical as they find themselves unable to move. Would-be rescuers find themselves trapped in the sticky mess as they try to free their friends.

Rachel is the only one of the newcomers to look concerned. "We've got to help them! If we don't get that stuff off them soon, it'll never come out in the wash!"

"No. We've got to find Twinkie-Man and stop him." Nick is feeling rather annoyed at having been denied his afternoon snack, and is getting grumpy. Derek recognizes the signs, and realizes he really should have made Nick take a nap or something before they left. He tries to think of something to placate the young man, but before he can, Alex cuts in.

"Or her."

Nick gives Alex a dirty look. "I'm _not_ arguing with you over the gender of a Twinkie! Besides, it's a _he_."

Alex's reply is interrupted by the sound of children's screams coming from the far side of the park. The nine run towards the sound, and discover a group of school-children, who have been skiving off afternoon lessons and have been cornered by the ferocious, but stupid-looking, monster. The Rangers look at each other before Tommy yells out, "Shift into... uh..." he looks at his companions. "What are we at the moment? Ninjas?"

Adam frowns, "Mighty Morphins?"

Tanya shakes her head. "Aren't we Super Samurais?"

"No," Adam says, "Wrong show."

Justin clicks his fingers. "Turbo Rangers! Remember, we have cool cars now?"

"Oh, yeah." Tommy is still looking a little confused. "Shift into Turbo!"

The other Rangers wave their arms over their heads, waggle their ears and stick out their tongues, before a low-budget backdrop appears behind them, and they morph into suited, multi-coloured super-heroes.

"Let's go kick Twinkie-butt!" Tommy yells, waving his arms about.

Rachel's eyes open wide. "How bizarre! They appear to communicate without moving their mouths. Stranger yet, noise is generated when they wave their arms around!"

"My Gott, you're right!" Derek agrees. Nick looks amazed.

"How _do_ they do that! That is so cool!"

More screams return their attention to the school-children. Rachel spots Kat amongst the group, and lets out an unearthly shriek. "Kat! Why aren't you in school young lady!"

"Momeee!" Kat whines, about to get creamed by the Twinkie. The monster turns to look at the Rangers and Legacy and immediately looses interest in the kids with the prospect of bigger prey to cream. The Rangers rush towards the Twinkie in unison and began to fight it. Kat runs to the Legacy, but as Rachel begins chewing her out over skipping classes, Kat begins to wish she'd taken her chances with the Twinkie.

The Rangers continue to fight, dodging the creamy filling being flung at them by using a series of carefully choreographed moves. Strangely enough, when the filling hits the ground near them, it explodes, filling the air with sparks and green smoke.

With an evil laugh too corny to be broadcast, the Twinkie succeeds in pinning the Rangers to the ground with cream filling. Smoke starts to rise from the filling, and the Rangers begin screaming. Well... groaning dramatically while waving their arms back and forth rather feebly anyway. The Twinkie runs off in triumph, creaming by-standers as he goes. The Legacy members run over to where the Rangers are smoldering on the ground, and pull them to their feet.

"Um... guys, I think we have a problem." Tommy turns a brighter shade of red than the spandex he wore. It appears that Twinkie filling disagrees with spandex; The Rangers' suits have been melted away, leaving... nothing! The Rangers make a mad dash for the nearest bushes, having discovered that they are wearing only their birthday suits.

"From now on, I'm wearing underwear under my suit!" The Ranger Kat wails. "I don't care what you say about 'panty lines', Tanya. This _is not_ going to happen again! And I haven't even waxed my legs this month!"

Adam looks up to find Tommy smirking at him. "Hey! It's kinda cold out here!" he protests, covering his delicates with his hands. "It's not my fault!"

The Legacy follows them to the bushes.

"See, Nick? I always told you that stuff could rot your teeth." Alex smirks on the way over. Nick just opens his mouth to reply a couple times, but drops the subject when he can't think of a suitable reply.

_Woohoo! Beat him again... point for me! Alex-70, Nick-9!_ Alex thinks happily.

"Derek, dude, you guys are going to have to take over for us." Tommy pleads. "Without our suits, we're powerless!" Rachel looks over, and catches Alex _peeking_ at the male Rangers and pulls her back, appalled. She then takes a quick glance herself, and grins appreciatively. Derek turns to see Nick doing a little staring of his own, sighs at the incompetence around him, and turns back to talk with Tommy. Alex motions for Nick to come over to her and Rachel.

"He's not even _looking_!" Alex whispers fiercely to her younger associate.

"Maybe there's something _wrong_ with him." Rachel is already calculating how much money she can make out of that counseling session for Derek.

Derek hears snickering behind him, and turns again to find the others laughing amongst themselves. "What!" Derek snaps.

"Nothing." Nick says innocently, giving him a big grin.

Turning back to the Rangers, "Can't you just have Alpha... what's that word?" Derek looks back to his friends for language support.

"What word?" Nick manages to stop grinning long enough to look like he is paying attention.

"Like what they do on Star Trek. When they transport things from ship to ship?"

"Beam?" Alex chips in helpfully.

"Exactly." Derek is glad _someone_ on his team watches the same shows he does. "Can't you just have Alpha beam down new suits?"

"We would, but we've already reached our spandex limit for the month." Ranger Kat explains. "We won't be able to get new ones for another week."

"Here, take our wristbands." Adam takes off the only piece of clothing to have come through the ordeal intact. "I'll call Alpha first and have him bring the RangerSuit machine."

Presently, the little hyperactive robot appears, along with a machine that resembles the microwave in the kitchen on Angel Island, shortly after Nick's 'exploding cupcakes' experiments. The Rangers hand their watches over to Derek, who hands them out to his own team.

"There's one too many." Derek puzzles. Nick grabs the extra, and tosses it to the Legacy Kat.

"Here honey, have fun." Nick grins, with a wicked look at Rachel. The psychiatrist wigs out.

"No! It's too dangerous! I will not allow my daughter to be a _Ranger_!" She gets some dirty looks from the under-dressed ones in the bushes, but skillfully ignores them.

"Aiyiyiyiyi! You guys have got to stop doing this!" Alpha is having a little electronic coronary. "Zordon is making spandex as fast as he can and he still can't keep up with you."

"I've got some." Rachel says quietly.

"Rachel, you carry spandex around in your purse?" Nick shakes his head. Rachel blushes.

"Well... I've got this patient who is afraid of blond bimbos in spandex that..."

"Never mind. I _don't_ want to know." Nick interrupts hurriedly.

Rachel pulls the spandex out of her purse and hands it to Alpha. He sticks it in the machine, which scans each of the Legacy members with some sort of laser, making a funky humming noise as it does so.

"Now all you have to do is push the 'Power Up' button on the wristband." Tommy explains to the Legacy members. "You'll be beamed directly into the suits."

"I thought you had to say all that 'Power Ranger One' stuff?" Legacy Kat asks, squirreling up her nose in a miserable attempt to look cute.

"We just say all that stuff for the people watching." Justin is desperate to impress the only person around his age. "It sounds cool, don't you think?"

"Uh-huh." Kat nods unconvincingly. "_Dork_." she mutters under her breath.

The Rangers glare at Justin for revealing their secret.

"Don't tell anyone, okay?" Tanya says. "Or Zordon'll make us clean out the control centre, and it gets really yukky there."

The Legacy members ignore her, and push the wristwatch buttons at the same time. They disappear and reappear in the spandex suits.

"Ack! Derek you gave me the wrong one!" Nick looks down at the pink spandex suit, horrified. "Quick, Green, trade wristbands with me!"

Kat and Nick pull their bands off, returning to regular, then put the new bands on, arriving in spandex once again.

"The lunchbox has landed!" Rachel and Alex drool together, as they stare approvingly at Nick in spandex. Derek, not having seen _The Full Monty_ yet, looks around, expecting to see a picnic basket materializing on the lawn. Nick blushes and quickly pushes a button on his band, disappearing.

Rachel moans, "Blue is soooo depressing. I want to be Yellow."

"No way sister!" Alex taunts gleefully.

Derek looks a little disappointed at his suit. "But dis shade of red isn't mein color." he complains, to no one in particular. Nick reappears a minute later, wearing his leather jacket, jeans, and Doc Martin boots. The only thing still Rangerish is the helmet.

"Nick! Where'd your suit go!" Derek demands, as the girls give heavy sighs of disappointment.

"I am _not_ wearing that in public!" Nick says, adamantly. "The guys'll think I'm strange!"

"Hey, we're doing it too!" Legacy Kat suddenly cried out, interrupting. "The not-moving-our-mouths but-still-talking-somehow thing. Cool!"

"Well, let's go. We've got a city to save." Derek commands his team. They run after the Twinkie, who has returned to creaming the park inhabitants.

The Legacy launches an attack, and the monster returns fire. The two opposing sides dueling for the defeat of the other. The fight is fierce, but at the same time kinda smooshy, and the Twinkie is quickly worn down by the relentless attack of the LegacyRangers, and the sight of Rachel in spandex.

* * *

Meanwhile... back in the bushes: "Uh, anybody there? Alpha? Guys? Help!" The only return they get on their calls for help is silence... Laughing silence.

* * *

Divatox and the Devil are watching the fight from the fish-shaped submarine, which somehow lays undetected at the bottom of San Francisco Bay. When they see their monster being defeated, they have a major panic, which is only averted by Elgar's bright idea to bring out the torpedoes. Divatox's minions load the tubes and fire off two projectiles, which for some odd reason are also shaped like giant fish. They aren't too aerodynamic, and keep coughing and spluttering as they speed, or rather, plod, towards the park. Divatox laughs maniacally as the torpedoes head towards her dessert-cake servant, as the Devil, not knowing what is going on, only cringes in the corner, envisioning the massive mess that will be caused by two not-so-high-projectile objects striking a massive Twinkie.

* * *

Nick sees the torpedoes coming, and warns everyone to get down. Derek, forgetting the old saying of 'Women and children first!', jumps behind the nearest bushes. He scrambles out again as he realizes they are being occupied by a group of ex-spandex clad rollerbladers, and quickly finds another bunch of bushes to duck under. Nick and Alex hide behind a statue, and Rachel crawls behind an industrial-sized dumpster which someone has amazingly managed to leave there. Kat just watches from where she stands.

"Cool!" she beams as the torpedoes sway ever closer.

"Kat! Get away from there!" Rachel begins to wig again. Kat sighs and rolls her eyes, but ignores her mother.

"Young lady, get your butt behind these bushes!" Derek commands, forgetting that it is practically impossible to order a ten-year old child to do anything.

"Mom, Derek wants me to go behind the bushes with him, and he's wearing spandex? Kat sticks her tongue out at the hapless Dutchman, who is really wishing he'd never even bothered to get out of bed this morning. Rachel gives Derek a look that he luckily can't see through the psychotic's - sorry, psychiatrist's - dark face-protector. Nick, realizing he'll have no one to go Trick-Or-Treating with this Hallowe'en if Kat doesn't move quickly, rushes out and pushes Kat into the bushes. The two land on top of Derek, who just lies very still, and begins to day-dream about a hot bath and a nice, big bottle of whiskey.

* * *

The moment finally comes as the torpedoes hit their mark. Smoke envelopes the Twinkie and sparks fly high into the air. The LegacyRangers all look towards the giant Roman-Candle-Formerly-Known-As-Twinkie-Man in hope that the projectiles have done their job for them.

"Hey, can you see anything Nick?" Alex inquires.

"No. Just a bunch of smoke. Wait! I see something... it's... it's... drat!"

The smoke is cleared away just as suddenly as it came by a gust of well positioned wind that also quickly departs. What stands in the place Twinkie-Man originally occupied is far more hideous, and much larger, than it's predecessor. Our friend, the Twinkie, is now the heighth of a medium sized office building, give or take a story or two. He has obtained a ridiculous looking cowboy hat, a bandanna that is tied around his neck, a really big rope lasso, and a corny smile in his second transformation of the day.

All five of the LegacyRangers take one good look at Giant-Twinkie-Man and take off running towards the bushes that are currently being occupied by the original Rangers.

Tommy asks the breathless invaders, "Dudes, why are you back? Didja beat the Twink-Man already?"

"Not quite," Alex admits.

Legacy Kat continues, "There were these missiles that hit the Twinkie and then there was a bunch of smoke and then and it got really big and now it looks like that Twinkie guy you see on all the TV commercials and then we all ran back here."

"Darn that Divatox! She _always_ does this to us. Every time we're winning, she cheats," Tanya complains.

Rachel questions, "How are we supposed to fight something that big without breaking a sweat?"

Tommy and Adam help each other tell the LegacyRangers about the Turbo Zords, and how to use them, in a long explanation that need not be drawn out here in this story. When they finish, the LegacyRangers take off in the direction of the Twinkie, eager to use their new-found weapons.

"Hey wait! Don't leave us here!" Adam calls out to the departing figures. He starts to stand, but realizes that he is about to expose himself to the world and sinks back down behind the bushes.

* * *

The five LegacyRangers slow their pace as they return to the spot where the torpedoes had collided with the Twinkie. They all line up in a straight line as they have been instructed to do. "Does anyone else think this is a little silly?" Nick asks the others.

Derek and Kat nod in agreement, but Rachel adds, "I think it's cute. Maybe we can work this into some sort of group work-out when this is all over."

"Oh! Good idea. I know this guy who teaches line dancing to polka music. I think I'll give him a call later. Lord knows we could all use a good group workout once in a while." Alex offers cheerfully, much to the dismay of the three sensible participants in the group.

Derek makes a little coughing noise and tries to regain control by saying, "When you two are done the rest of us are ready to save the world."

"Oh, yeah. Sorry," Rachel and Alex apologize at the same time.

The five hold their wrist-watches out in front of them and yell in unison to the heavens, "We need Turbo-MegaZord-Power now!" Derek has a little trouble getting the whole line out correctly but no one seems to notice in the slightest bit.

Off in the distance, five cars that look amazingly like big Japanese toys appear. They roll rapidly towards the quintet, and as they get nearer, don't seem to be getting any slower. Each replacement Ranger's life quickly flashes before his or her eyes as the cars bear down on them. Kat, being the youngest, gets done with her mental flash before the others and finds the cars halted directly in front of them, idling. As the others are still traveling through their lives, curiosity gets the better of her and she jumps high into the air and disappears into her pink Wind Chaser Turbo Zord. The four adults come out of it at about the same time and realize that they aren't dead, much to Derek's dismay. "Cool, this makes the spandex worth it!" Nick exclaims as he dashes towards his green Desert Thunder Turbo Zord. To head off any forthcoming panic attacks, Kat waves at the remaining three from her Zord to reassure her mother that she is still in the area.

Seeing that Kat is alright, Rachel heads for her blue Mountain Blaster Zord and Derek and Alex follow to their respective Red Lightning and yellow Dune Star vehicles. As everyone is getting comfortable in their cars, Derek hits one of the many levers in the Zord with his elbow. His red car lunges forward, does a couple doughnuts in the nearest sandbox, and careens off towards San Fransisco Bay. He can be heard yelling at the top of his quickly departing lungs, "How do I drive dis tiiiiiiiinnnnnnnnggggggg!

Nick bursts out laughing, only to be interrupted by a loud, irritating beep that is accompanied by a bright flashing button on his console. He pushes the button and his viewscreen blazes to life. Alpha appears on the screen and instructs Nick to continue fighting the Twinkie while he works on getting Derek back from the horizon. "You heard the robot, let's kick some Twinkie butt!"

The four remaining LegacyRangers quickly figure out how the Zords operate and in no time are driving erratically around the Twinkie and shooting at it with their cars' weapons. The Twinkie retaliates with his electrified lasso, trying to catch the cars in his deadly rope. He manages to catch Alex and Rachel a couple of times, resulting in a duo of slightly crispy females. Kat and Nick, using the skills they have obtained from playing many a video game together, have no trouble avoiding the flying energized lasso. In fact, Nick appears to be having a little _too_ much fun in his car. In between firing at the Twinkie, trying to avoid Rachel and Alex, and distracting the Twinkie when it has snared one of the two in it's rope, he uses the skate-board ramp as a launching pad for aerial stunts.

In the background, a towtruck, playing the Power Rangers theme song from the speakers mounted on top, pulls up with the Red Turbo Zord in tow. When it comes to a stop at the edge of the park, Alpha climbs out. He detaches the car quickly and walks up to the driver's window. The window rolls down and water rushes out, along with a couple of fish. "Aiyiyiyi! Derek! It'll take me _months_ to cleans this thing!" Derek doesn't answer but instead starts up the car, manages to get it going in the correct direction, and heads off to join the others.

As Derek rejoins the group, Nick declares over the inner-Zord radio frequency, "We need to make the Super... Mega... uh... Thingie!"

"Nick, _I'm_ in charge!" Derek snaps.

"Humph, fine."

"Guys, we need to make the Super Mega Thingie!"

Rachel immediately asks, "How do we do that?"

"Adam said that we just need to get the cars lined up with each other and it'll happen on it's own. Weren't you guys listening to anything they said!" Derek pauses a moment, rolls his eyes, and then, "Oh wait, I forgot. You had _other _things on your minds."

Kat, impatient to get home to watch her favorite afternoon cartoons, breaks in, "Can we just get going? _Super Mutated Frogs From An As Of Yet Undiscovered Galaxy_ is gonna be on soon and it's the last part of a week long mini-series. I can't miss it!"

Rather than argue with Kat, the others quietly maneuver their cars around to form the robot. Just before they completely line up, Nick bashes his car into the side of Derek's. "That's for stealing my quote!" he yells to the inside of his car.

"Nick, keep you car still! You keep hitting me!"

"I'm trying to!" again, only to himself.

"Try harder! I hardly know how to drive dis ting!"

"I've been driving mine just as long as you've been driving yours!"

"Stop yelling at me!"

"Who's yelling!"

"STOP IT!" the female trio yell at once.

Happy to have exacted revenge for the stolen quote Nick quickly regains his position in the group as does Derek. The little 'no-smoking' and 'seatbelt' lights on their dashboards blink on and the 'please return your tray to the closed position and your seats to their upright positions' message plays over the speakers in their helmets. Alex looks around for her seatbelt but can't seem to find it. Suddenly the cars pitch forward, and in a few slow-motion carefully choreographed moves they meld together to form the Turbo Mega Zord. When the light show fades and the 'auto pilot' light blinks off the giant robot starts to lurch around as if having some sort of muscular problem. Or the mechanical equivalent of muscles anyway.

"Derek, let Nick drive! You're gonna kill us!" Alex announces from the cockpit where all of their seats have arrived together during the Zords' metamorphosis.

After taking one glance at the stern look in Alex's eyes he reluctantly climbs out of the driver's seat and Nick eagerly takes over. "Hey, wonder what this button does?" Nick immediately pushes the little purple button with a picture of a sword on it. The Mega Zord breaks into a little dance routine, and in the end, produces a gigantic sword out of nowhere.

"Here goes nothing!" Nick pilots the Mega Zord towards the Twinkie, who has finally gotten over his surprise that they actually got all the cars together, and attacks.

Having no sword of his own, the Twinkie retreats a short distance and launches a barrage of filling at the robot. One of the blobs catches the Turbo Mega Zord in the eye panels. "Ack! I can't find the windshield wipers!" Nick panics. The others all begin searching frantically for anything closely resembling what he is looking for.

"Here they are!" Kat flips the switch from her console in the rear of the cockpit and the wipers spring to life, quickly flicking the sticky substance from windows that form the robot's eyes.

Seeing that the goo has no effect on the giant metallic man, Twinkie-Man tries his lasso. He manages to catch the Mega Zord in the loop and sends a bolt of electricity to fry the LegacyRangers. Nick reacts quickly and cuts the rope with the Zord's sword. Having no effective weapon to use, Twinkie-Man retreats towards the city to look for a weapon of some sort, flinging white filling all the way. The Legacy five follow him along his path of destruction. Spying a sturdy light pole along the way, Twinkie tears it from it's rightful home and turns to stand his ground. The Mega Zord catches up and the foes begin to fight again. As they attack and retreat, slice and duck, many buildings are crushed and destroyed. Astonishingly, no one in the city seems to notice.

The LegacyRangers force the Twinkie back towards the park and up against a really tall rock-climbing wall so that he has no place to go. "Twinkie-Man, you've passed your Use-By-Date! Prepare to meet your maker!" Nick cries out as he readies for the final blow.

"Haha, you're wrong there! I don't have a Use-By-Date! Bwahahahaha!"

Nick pulls the Twinkie wrapper out of his coat pocket. "No... it says you were supposed to have been eaten by... last week! Hey, wait a minute... Alex, why didn't you tell me my snack was out-of-date?"

Rachel makes a mental note to help Nick with the pain later. "Nick, I have an opening tomorrow morning after Derek's session. Come see me. We can _talk_ about his."

While Nick is in shock over what he ingested earlier in the day, Kat sees the Twinkie advancing, readying for a fatal blow. She rushes forward, knocks Nick out of the driver's seat, and grabs the controls. As Twinkie-Man rushes forward and attempts to slice off the Turbo Mega Zord's head with a sharp piece of metal he has ripped from a nearby fountain, Kat maneuvers the Zord into ducking position. The sudden movement throws Nick all around the cockpit. As the Twinkie rushes by, she sticks the robot's leg out and trips the giant snack cake monster. It tries to keep it's balance, but fails miserably, landing face-first with a loud '_Splat!_'. Kat brings the robot to stand over the fallen Twinkie and raises the Zord's sword. "There can be only one!" she exclaims as she brings the sword down, separating the Twinkie's corny smile and funky cowboy hat from the rest of it's body.

"Um... wrong cross-over Kat," Nick extends from the far corner of the cockpit where he has landed.

"Oops! Sorry," Kat grins sheepishly.

Light begins to shoot out of the decapitated Twinkie and the LegacyRangers are momentarily blinded. The entire world changes colors and returns to normal as lightning strikes and thunder rolls. When the storm clears and their vision returns, the decapitated Twinkie is no where to be seen. The five start to discuss what has happened when the original Rangers run up to the robot, apparently having obtained clothing from somewhere.

Adam calls out to the Mega Zord and those inside, "Separate the cars!"

Derek shouts back down to him, "How in gott's name do we do that?"

"Push the 'Separate' button on the console," Justin helpfully interrupts.

Derek looks at the console with great concentration. A ton of different buttons, mostly unmarked, stare back.

"Just don't push the re...!" Tanya yells a warning, but it is a little too late.

"Here goes nutting," Derek mutters to himself as he pushes the big red octagon shaped button. The Legacy Rangers are ejected high into the air as the five cars separate and are forcefully thrown apart. One lands in the park fountain, another wraps itself around a tree. The other three fly off to their destruction in the distance. The loud 'Thwumps!' made as the LegacyRangers hit the ground bring the Rangers attention back from their smoking vehicles. As the dust clears, the Rangers see that the LegacyRangers are okay and have somehow managed to transform back to their regular old Legacy selves. The two groups look around at the destruction that seems to be everywhere. Nick immediately spots a familiar looking building lying in ruins at the edge of the park.

"Ack! It was only in the shop one day to have the mirrors polished! My car!" Turning to Derek, "You trashed my Mustang!"

Justin, spying his own sporty blue roadster wrapped around a tree, pipes up, "_Your_ car! You trashed my Turbo Zord! How do I explain _that one_ to the insurance company?"

"_Insurance_? I bet you don't even have a license! You're not old enough."

"Do too. See!" Justin pulls a laminated card out of his little red velcro wallet and shows it to Nick. "We had to get them after Adam went the wrong way down a one-way street and got pulled over by the cops."

Nick gets a funny mental image of the big Japanese toy cars being chased by the little cop cars and gives up, "Sure. Okay. Whatever." He turns to walk back to the Legacy group.

Justin has heard just one too many 'you're too young and or short' jabs and cracks. He does a running-triple-backflip combinations and plants his feet in Nick's spine, knocking Nick painfully to the ground.

Nick jumps to his feet and is just about to retaliate when Alex interrupts, "Nick! You can't hit him, he's just a kid!"

Justin growls at the last remark and steam can actually be seen rising from his head. He takes off running for the nearest airport, screaming all the way.

"Oh great... now we need another Ranger. I hate it when this happens," Adam gripes.

"Hey, I know! Kat, wanna be a Ranger?" Tommy asks the young girl.

Kat responds cheerfully, "Oh boy, do I!"

"Cool!" Tommy says to no one in particular.

Kat remembers her over-protective mother and turns just in time to see Rachel storming towards her. Rachel grabs Kat, putting her hand firmly over Kat's mouth. She then proceeds to drag Kat away, towards the ferry landing. "Nick, I don't care if you _do_ hate that boy! Go and bring him back! I will not have a _Ranger_ for a daughter! My medical renown will be ruined!" she cries out and she keeps the hand over Kat's mouth, somehow rips both her wristband and Kat's off, throws them back towards the Rangers, and keeps going all at the same time.

"Don't worry about it, he'll show up in a week or two. This happens all the time," Tanya explains.

Nick raises an eyebrow towards the scarily strange teenagers, tosses his wristband back to it's rightful owner and turns to follow Rachel. He doesn't get too far before the wristband that is still on Derek's arm beeps loudly. "Now what?"

"It's Zordon. Push the little blue button Derek," Adam instructs.

Derek pushes the button and Zordon's image show up on the little view-screen and his voice comes forth from the little tiny speaker below, "Thanks to my Rangers and your co-operation, Divatox and the Devil have given up and gone home. I owe you my gratitude. If you ever need the services of the Rangers..."

"Hey! That voice sounds familiar!" Nick interrupts as he returns to Derek's side. "Isn't that... no, it can't be. He's in Hell."

"This is _worse_ than _Hell_!" Zordon quickly retorts.

"Ha! I was right. It _is_ Sloan!" Nick gloats.

Amazed, Derek finds his tongue, "You're right! William, where are you?"

"Planet Eltar. Could you guys come and get me? I'm all alone here. I can't even get my 'National Geographic' subscription here."

"Not until the Legacy has it's own space shuttle, which probably won't be _that_ long," Alex adds cheerfully.

Derek tries helping with, "Can't you just... what's that word again... oh yeah... beam yourself back?"

"No! They've got me chained to this darn spandex machine and I can't reach the transport controls. You've got to get me out of here!"

"We'll work on it. See you around Sloanie!" Nick pushes the blue button on the wristband, shutting down the communication link.

Derek, not believing what Nick has just done, turns to Nick and asks, "Why the heck did you do that!"

"I'm hungry. Let's go," Nick says as he tosses his band back to the Rangers and heads towards the ferry launch once again.

Derek just stares after Nick in disbelief. Then, in an attempt to keep the Legacy name untarnished in the Rangers' eyes, "Well, it was nice working with you. Maybe we can do it again sometime?" He hands the wristband back to Tommy.

As Alex hands her band to Adam he remarks, "Uh... maybe not"

Taking the que to leave, Derek wraps his arm around Alex's shoulders and the pair follow after Nick.

"If I never see another piece of spandex it'll be too soon," Alex can be heard announcing as the Legacy five all climb aboard the ferry for Angel Island.

* * *

**The End!**

**Next Up**: It's a Bird, It's a Plane... No Wait, It's Only Kat's Dirty Mutated Sock!

Now... a couple of things. This story was contrived after a very wacky afternoon/evening on IRC with my Ambiguously Strange friend from across the ocean, Aly J. Somehow we got on the subject of Power Rangers and never looked back. Don't ask me why we did it, we don't know. I'd have to go with the 'temporary insanity' plea. Except.. I don't think it's temporary. g

There are many a thing about the Legacy House that I have taken for granted in this story. I'm not quite sure of the lay-out of the place and I just put rooms where I wanted them. Please forgive me. eg Also, in my imaginary world, the kitchen is about three times the size of the one we have seen in the PtL series. It gives the Twinkie room to run and hide.

This is my first attempt at fan-fiction of any sort. Aly has written a couple of stories that I know of already. If I have made any glaring mistakes, please let me know. If you like the story, or if you don't, again, please let me know. I just want to know that people actually read this darn thing. g

Little Disclaimer Thingie: We don't own the Poltergeist the Legacy or Power Ranger characters, or the Twinkie stuff. Someone else does. We had tons of fun with them and are quite likely to borrow some, or all, again sometime.

There were no peacocks or possessed kitty cats harmed in the writing or this story. I think I may have chewed off a couple of fingernails though.


End file.
